♥ Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Breathing calmly, I looked at you
Who had fallen so asleep, so exhausted-looking
The sweet, unprotected profile
That no one in the world but I know"
JEWEL - ayumi hamasaki
...
I used to think that my fate with you was never-ending, because we always saw each other, almost every day, in the past. But now, it seems as though our fate has run out or something. I don't see you anymore. I can't even remember when the last time I saw you was.
But everyone else seemed to be seeing you almost every day... I really want to see you. Even if it's from somewhere far away...
You didn't come to school today, so I think you've fallen ill. I have prayed, and I will pray for you again. I want you to get well. No time to get sick! I'm already out of your sight so you have no excuse to be unwell! Hahaha!
But still...
To be unable to see you, I took that as my punishment for ruining you. Whenever I get hit by people whom think that I'm immune to pain, and that I'm suffering a physical pain, I took that as my punishment for humiliating you.
It's all my fault, and every unfortunate thing that happened to me is the result of my selfishness. My punishment.
When I lost my way, and the mark is too far, I was muttering to myself, "Such is life..."...
I may strongly dislike a lot of things that happened to me, occasionally asking, "why?" and shedding tears that only I want to see, I can only realize that such is life. Life's like that. I won't be sad because of such a thinking.
Ah, the memories are overflowing. There's something magical about our memories, about our past. I somehow seem to remember something "new" every day, laughing at the sudden realization that such a thing had happened before.
Today, I remembered that you snore in your sleep, just like me! Hahaha, your snores sound so adorable, I wish I could hear them every day...
I will always have a smile on my face, and I will always try to be as happy as I can be. Because you told me before, "I don't like emo people."
---
Ah, today was English! Honestly, I think both papers were super easy, but I'm very worried about my Paper 1.
You know, the Section One of the Paper 1, the word range is 350 to 500 words, right? Guess how many words I wrote? I wrote 961 words! Like, it's almost double the maximum recommended words! My friends told me that they won't deduct marks for exceeding the word limit, just that I might have more grammar mistakes. I hope I won't get any!
After the whole English paper, which was about 7pm, I wanted to go to the toilet, so I went to the one at the basketball court. And guess what. The door was locked, there were voices inside. And there was a super strong stench of cigarette smoke. Obviously, some people were smoking in the toilet. It stinks.
I don't get smokers. In fact, I hate them! A packet of cigarettes cost about $11... I mean that's a lot of money! You can save so much money if you don't smoke! And they're like what, underage people? Where the hell do they get their money from to buy cigarettes?!
...
"Ah - I hope your smiling face
Is with me until the day
I fall into an eternal sleep"
Dearest - ayumi hamasaki
Listened to music @ 10:08 PM
